Grave Confessions
by Mistykins06
Summary: This past summer I wrote a little something for the Sherlolly Cafe based on the prompt "Molly seems upset so Sherlock follows her after work. Molly goes to her father's grave where Sherlock hears her say, "but I love him Dad. I just can't help it."


"I'm leaving now." Came the quiet voice of a Molly Hooper, but he didn't bother to comment or look up from his phone.

"Mike is covering for me, and you should be set for the afternoon with that experiment we started last week." She slipped her coat on and picked up her bag. "Bye." The door closed behind her.

Sherlock Holmes tossed his phone on the work desk. He knew Molly was sad. Knew the reason of course too. But he couldn't seem to connect why he felt guilty about it. It had nothing to do with him after all.

[[read more]]

Long ago, Mycroft had taught him that feelings clouded judgement. Caring was not an advantage. It was sound, logical advice and it helped him become the success that he was today. That didn't mean that he didn't have to fight it though. Today he was fighting, and loosing.

Abandoning the experiment the he shrugged on his own coat and left. Outside he hailed a cab and gave him the address across town nearing the suburbs. It was a long ride. One that made him question what he was doing heading there to begin with, but then the image of Molly's sad eyes would come to him and he found his resolve to press on.

The cab rolled into a the town on he outskirts of London when Sherlock spied a familiar form walking into a coffee shop.

"Stop the cab!" He yelled causing the driver to swerve to avoid a collision. Giving no mind to it he waited and watched a couple of minutes till Molly emerged carrying not one but two cups of coffee. "Drive on."

The cab driver continued on several blocks to the address and hi paid and hopped out. Walking around a bit till he found the spot he wanted he looked to a good spot to wait for her.

Hearing the gate open and close he tensed up. Soft footsteps sounded on the frozen ground. A moment later she spoke in a low broken voice. "Hello Dad- Daddy." A long moment of quiet passed. Sherlock sat hidden from Molly's view on a bench around the corner from her family's plot

"Oh here dad. I brought you a cup of coffee. Just how you like it." The hollow sound of the cup being set on the headstone reached his ears. He couldn't see her, but he imagined her taking a tiny sip of her own cup.

"I've missed our coffees together Dad. I can't believe it's been 7 years. I...I miss you. So much. So very, very much." Sherlock knew her sad eyes had finally given in and allowed him the tears to come. The question of weather he should remain hidden or not plagued him. She hated when anyone saw her cry. Especially him.

He'd seen her cry before though of course, his words could cut her deeper than any blade. But also after the Fall, she'd sobbed into his chest till she slept about watching him jump and lying to all his friends and for what they all had gone through. It made her angry and a bit afraid that she'd done so the next morning. Molly Hooper wanted to believe that she was stronger than that.

Right now though, she let the tears fall unguarded and unchecked. Then he heard her take a deep breath before she spoke. "Right then. Enough of that 'utter nonsense' as you call it. So let's do the updates shall we?

"Mom is doing well. Carol Ann made her go on Holiday to mark this day. She's good, but she miss you. They took a cruise to Italy Daddy. Can you imagine mom on a huge ship?" She lets out a ghost of a laugh. "Perhaps she'll make new friends or meet a man. The past few years have been tough on her and I know you didn't want us to wallow, and she's done her fair share of it." Molly thought some then spoke again.

"Oh. Cousin James and his wife had a sweet baby girl with the loveliest ginger hair like her mother but our sides deep brown eyes. They named her Lucy after Grandma. You'd love her to pieces Dad."

" finally sold her house. I'm sure the neighborhood threw a party to celebrate that she would no longer be there to monitor the last time they trimmed the hedges." A quiet laugh sounded. It was a bit mirthful as she recalled happier times in her youth. It left quickly as she spoke again. "We have nothing nationally to celebrate. No new royal scandals. No good movies or books out right now. Not that I've been to the cinema lately." Another pause of silence and a few more tears. Sherlock shifted subtly and leaned his elbows on his knees with his hands to his mouth. He knew what would come next, but didn't know what if he was ready to hear it. To leave though would only upset her should his presence be made known to her. Better to stay there then face Molly's wrath over him following her here today.

"I guess you want an update on me." A long pause follows by a sniffle and a wipe at more tears. "Oh God I'm a mess Daddy. A certifiable mess.

" I ended things with Tom. No, no he didn't break my heart. Do not go haunt him or anything like that ok? He's a good guy. Really, dad he is. But he's not... Right for me.

"Well, actually he was a bit. He was great. Everything you always wanted me to find in a guy. Steady job, great family relationships, devoted. Nice. A good man.

"But Daddy, I'm not a good person. I kept so many secrets from him... Things I could never tell anyone, not even you. I've lied, and lied until I started to believe all the lies myself I think. It was all for a good reason though. And it was worth it. It kept Sherlock safe.

"Sherlock's back by the way. I never lied to you exactly about him. I told you he how jumped and that he was gone. And he was, but he was never dead... Well, no wait. You know actually he was, but only for a few minutes, and that was recently. I hope you weren't wondering about your afterlife looking for him to punch him in the face. " He heard her joke and allowed his lips a ghost of a smile. Such terrible, morbid humor Molly.

"Daddy I helped him fake it. His death that is to keep him and others safe and alive. It was a good reason, I know that you would understand that, but it came at a cost. I lied about it so often that I started to believe it actually happened the way I said. I went to his funeral. Well, of course I knew it wasn't his, but I had to pretend. So I cried and I mourned him as I buried every feeling of tenderness and girlish fantasies I had for him that day in an empty coffin. I sort of started my life over. I moved on. Met Tom and was so happy.

"Then Sherlock came back and I knew I was lost. So completely lost. Tom is a good man, and I cared for him, wanted to make it work with him I wantedto love him...Only, all that I was infatuated with Sherlock years ago was back and with it had his trust and he told me that I mattered.

"I know he only said it because I was key to faking his death. But Daddy, the way he said it made me want to believe he cares about me. Even a little bit."

Molly sniffled a bit, and Sherlock realized then that his eyes had been closed as he focused on her words. Did she really thing he didn't care for her? Still?

"I did what a Hooper does though Daddy. I kept my word and was faithful and I wanted to keep my promise to become Tom's wife. But I... couldn't do it dad. It felt like that was the biggest lie, and the only person I was protecting was Tom. And being with Tom was like looking at a picture of a sunset, and Sherlock makes me feel like I'm there. I can feel all the warmth and grandness of it. The things that you can't get from a mere image. They just don't compare with one another.

"I don't want you to think I rushed my decision to end it or anything Dad it wasn't an easy decision. After all leaving a man who loved me for a man who only might care and even then not in any type of romantic sense is stupid, it's an insane choice but I love him Dad. I just can't help it. I will never feel for Tom what I feel for Sherlock Bloody Holmes and it won't be fair to pretend otherwise, so yes, I ended it."

Molly was crying again. It tore at parts of him he didn't even want to acknowledge existed. It was all he could do to jump and run. Whether to or from her he wasn't sure.

"I hope I haven't let you down. I know the last thing you wanted is for me to be alone. I'm not giving up on finding someone. Maybe, just maybe there's a man out there that I will find who I can love as much as I'll love him, but I'm not waiting for him." Sherlock grinned. There was the Molly he knew and loved. His smile froze.

Loved? That was ridiculous he didn't love her. He didn't do 'love' he barely tolerated caring. Except for John, Mary a Baby who hasn't even been born, Mrs Hudson and sometimes Lestrade his mind whispered traitorously. Was it so unreasonable to include Molly on that list?

Molly Hooper didn't belong on a list of friends he cared about his mind argued. You don't just love her. You are in love with her, you fool.

Well right then.

Sherlock stood. He walked quietly down the short path that lead to the back of His Pathologist. Hearing footsteps she turned around quickly looking ready to defend herself. She paused when she recognized him and just stared at him.

"What are you doing here Sherlock?" She asked angrily wiping her face with the back of her hand. Leaving a defiant expression behind it.

Sherlock continued to step forward and take her hand. Molly's expression changed to surprise and confusion. " Oh Molly, why must you insist on believing you don't count? I know what day it is. I knew where you'd be. Do you really think you had to do this or anything alone?" He dropped her hand and allowed both of his to cup her face, wiping the tears that continue to fall from her eyes against her will.

"You look beautiful when you cry Molly, but I don't think we should make it a habit." He gave in to a desire to place a gentle kiss on her forehead then pulled her into a hug. The embrace was stiff but Molly gave in and relaxed into it holding him tightly around the waist. They both stood quietly until she finally pushed back separating them.

Molly looked into his face, reading the sincerity in his eyes. She still looked confused but grateful that he was there.

"A bit better now?" He asked, missing the feel of her beside him instantly. Molly nodded.

"Um, let me just say goodbye then." Sherlock nodded then stepped off toward the gate. Smiling and making plans to take Molly somewhere warm for a bite to eat. Angelo's was sounding tempting on this cold day.

Molly turned back to the headstone, running her fingers across the smooth top. " Um, wow. Umm, that was him. Sherlock I mean, Dad, and I have no idea what that was about. But I think it's going to be ok after all. " Molly read the Name Robert Edward Hooper. Beloved Husband and father. Gone but never forgotten. Then turned to look at Sherlock Holmes waiting for her by the gate. Perhaps her waiting for him was over.


End file.
